How To Do Things You Hate

a.k.a. being an adult.  Really.

I don’t know how many things now I have done that I especially hated but simply needed to be done.  My worst enemy?  Dishes!  And how they come back multiple times a day.

It’s mind boggling.  (Not really)

But really, this can be overcome rather easily in 3 steps!

Step 1:  Find a task you hate.

This shouldn’t be hard to do at all.  I bet if you took five seconds to look around you, you could find at least 3 things that need to be done that you’ve been putting off.  Start with one.

Step 2:  Decide if you want to actually do it.

Also very easy.  In fact you’ve probably come up with the same answer:  “no YOU don’t want to do it, but man it sure would be nice if SOMEONE did it”.

Step 3:  Do it.

Turns out, that someone was you all along!  Congrats, you survived!  You didn’t melt from being productive, you didn’t die from overexposure to cleanliness, you are a warrior.  Now go be a warrior and conquer another task.


Chores.  Let’s face it, how many of us really like doing chores?

They’re such a drag, they take up too much time, you could be doing something so much more fun, so much more worthwhile!  Consistently putting off menial tasks like doing the dishes or putting away the laundry can have some dreadful drawbacks.

Eventually you may want to invite someone over, someone you want to impress.  It’d be a lot easier if they didn’t have to wade through last months’ laundry and hop over weekend trash in order to snag a seat.  If there’s a spot that’s not taken over by dishes or pizza boxes.  If you are a good host you will ask, “Would you like anything to drink?”  No matter they’re answer, it is heaven-sent if you find a clean glass.  Period.

~*~

For now, I’m going to part ways with the exaggerations.  Why is it so hard to do things that we don’t like?  Easy.

Because you get in your own way.

We gnash our teeth, we whine and we moan, but that task ain’t getting done until someone puts their nose to the grindstone.  Simply thinking about how much we dislike/hate something gets our blood flowing, fires us up.

But we are going to have to move past that.

Matt Abrahams said it beautifully in his lecture “Think Fast, Talk Smart:  Communication Techniques” – You want to view this as an opportunity, not a challenge.  (That video is gold and I highly recommend you watch it).

I have to repeat that:

“View this as an opportunity, not a challenge.”

By speaking to yourself in such a way you can change your perception.  And if you can change the lens with which you regard a task, you increase your chances of actually doing.

So instead of, “I hate doing the dishes” say something like, “I love the way the kitchen looks after the dishes have been done“.  You’re giving yourself the opportunity to make something you enjoy happen, instead letting yourself feel deflated by the task.

You still might not enjoy the doing, but you will surely enjoy the outcome.  Similarly to working towards a goal, reminds yourself of why.  (Hint:  the reason is because you deserve it).

Stop choosing to “put the dirty clothes in the hamper” later.  Choose to do it now, and leave it and your thoughts of later in the hamper.  Choose to be free of “I’ll get it done later”.  Choose to be free.


Do you think this guide is too simplistic?  In writing it, I sometimes think that as well.  However.  It really is that simple.  I think we put up with our mental gymnastics too much and let that stop us from living a fulfilling life.  Do you have an overactive “I should do” list?  Or are you a “get ‘er done” person?

Leave a comment below!

 

Dealing With Burnout, Get Re-Motivated!


I finally quit college after the first semester of my third year.  I had re-enrolled after dropping out the semester before for two main reasons:  pressure and shame.  My family and friends had expectations I would finish because I was so “smart” and it was the “right” thing to do.  I felt shame because I was failing.  My depression from relationship heartache was compounded by my lack of desire to attend school.

Leaving the second time was harder.

Even though I had switched majors to something I was more personally interested in – Graphic Design and Art – I still struggled to keep my attendance up.  Often I thought I could be teaching myself these very same concepts.  For cheaper or even at times “free”.  While I enjoyed my professors’ expertise and insights on different topics I felt out of place.

Did I really want to be in classes from 8 – 3 every day?  Did I need to earn a grade to feel fulfilled?  Why do I even dread the idea of being at this school?  Is it important enough for me to take time to deal with my underlying mental health issues or should I persevere through them?  Does this mean anything?  Is it more important for me to meet my parents expectations for a successful life over mine?

~*~

Burnout can be caused by a mixture of things but they lead to the same things:  physical and mental exhaustion.

How do you get there?  While there are certainly more ways to reach the burnout state, the two biggest contributing factors are stress and overworking.  While there are things that happen that are out of your hands, there is a great deal you can control.


Why are you feeling burned out?


Take a deep breath.  And another and another.  And try to clear your mind.  When you are ready or you’ve reached the point where you mind id mostly clear, slowly start to invite thoughts back in.  Ask yourself, “What is causing me distress at this point in life?”  When you are finished let those thoughts go.  Ask yourself another question.  “Is whatever is causing me distress worth holding onto?”  If you answered yes, keep going:  “What can I do to help manage that stress?”

 

~*~

 

College represents a lot of my failures in life.  My failure to finish is small compared to my failure to listen to what I actually wanted.  At that point in my life, I was an expert in ignoring what I wanted.  Now that I am older and I have this understanding of what brought me to that point in my life.  Easily, I can sum it up in this statement:  I did not hold authority over my own life.

The best way to recover from burnout is to be honest with yourself.  Take a long, hard look at your life and the circumstances leading up.  What were you doing?  What were you thinking about?  What were you feeling?   And then, why were you feeling that way?

Normally you can follow a long chain of thoughts down to the source(s).  It’s a simple task but it is not always easy.  I mentioned that I dropped out of college twice right?  That was purely because I was unwilling to accept my answer.  I was unwilling to accept that I wanted to do something so different from what was planned for me.  And let me tell you.  Aside from the mental/emotional stress, it also hurt my financial health.

So please be aware that sometimes the answer you are seeking is not the answer you are wanting.  Sometimes it is painful to do things that are actually good for you.  Things you have been putting off.


How to Take a Vacation When You Can’t


Because reasons.  Reasons like school or work.

Lately, I’ve been struggling with really nailing down my niche.  I mean this site has gone through some crazy changes in my opinion all geared towards seeking that perfect item I can write about.  And while I do believe in the things I wrote, it was not something that I wanted to write about everyday.  But I threw myself at it.  Day in and day out I was surfing the web eating up all the knowledge I could find and unsurprisingly, I sat down to write some article and just… couldn’t.

Then I stopped.  Slowly, I started being honest with myself and what I wanted and starting making changes to reflect that.  I still do research into my original niche – which was “how to make passive income through affiliate marketing”.  It wasn’t as frequent as before, but I still hung out on the fringes.

Even though I began writing more consistently after several weeks, what actually made me feel better was Wim Hof and crochet.  Wim Hof is the coolest example of what a human being can accomplish, and crochet was a thing I did that recently is becoming my addiction.  I started teaching myself more complex stitches and pushing myself to make things (like a set of gloves at the moment).  This little bit of fun, away from technology, away from really most of the world, I found the best joy in.

Crocheting is probably one of the most monotonous things I’ve done.  But you can accomplish so much by stringing together those monotonous events and suddenly, they become something beautiful.  The more I practiced, the better I got – naturally.  And the more I just started to enjoy the process.  And while I am crocheting, I mostly think about nothing.  I have to focus really hard at times to make sure that I don’t mess up.  Yet, even if I mess up, I can just unwind it.

 

Take time to do something you find fun and/or soothing.  Let yourself have that.  Even multiple helpings percolated through out your life.

Falling off the wagon doesn’t mean we still can’t make it to our destinations!  It just means we have to adapt to new circumstances and keep moving on.


While I hope you haven’t, have you had experiences with burnout?  Mention it in the comments below as well as any feedback you might have?  Like why these are almost always 1000 words long.

Benefits of Drinking Peppermint Tea

Peppermint Tea


With a recent delve into less than wholesome things my stomach has taken a real beating.  Oreo after oreo I’ve chased because I can’t stop at one… or two… or a whole line sometimes.  Lately Sam and I have also been watching “The Great British Baking Show” which has really brought out the baker in me.  Cakes, cookies, breads…  I’ve made so much I thought my stomach was going to explode.

Excess amounts of sugar and really processed foods tend to make me bloat and constipated.  This also tends to happen to me when I eat beans sparingly.  Here comes peppermint tea to save the day!

Peppermint is a really digestion friendly herb.  It’s carminative properties help relieve gas and promote flatulence which can help with bloating.  Due to its antispasmodic and analgesic nature you may wish to drink it to help with upset stomachs, heartburn, or more severe cases like colic and IBS.

The benefit leaks over to you muscles and head too!  That’s one why of the main ingredients in Icy Hot is menthol.  Though, go lightly at first because the chill can be real!  I also suggest if you have peppermint essential oil you mix it with a bit of a carrier oil, like say coconut or almond.

If you’ve ever had a nasty cold or cough you’ve might have dipped into chest rubs or vapor rubs.  They also contain menthol!  Inhaling the scent of peppermint can be pretty soothing on your airways and breaks up mucus.  One of my favorite things to do is make a hot herbal infusion of peppermint and while it cools to a drinkable level, inhale some of the vapors.  Having the humidity and menthol tickle my dry, irritable nostrils really hits the spot.  And while the vapors rise up they have a chance to return some moisture to my often dry face!

There are a lot of really neat uses for peppermint!  While this information is not meant to replace any prescriptions or treatments from our doctor, I find it really fascinating.  I hope that if you choose to drink peppermint or use a peppermint essential oil you would experience relief for whatever ails you.

Please note that peppermint is not intended for young children or babies or pregnant women.  Also note that some people might experience heartburn from drinking peppermint and if you have allergies to menthol you should definitely stay away.

~*~

Some of my most found memories are remembered through really fragrant teas.  Peppermint holds a dear place in my heart:  soothing, cool and minty.  Recently I learned peppermint is actually a cross between two different plants:  water mint and spearmint.

There’s something I must confess however:  I used to hate peppermint!

The hatred came from a bitter realization eating candy canes.  One year my parents started buying delicious, fruity sweet candy canes.  Oh my!  For my childish sensibility they were the TRUE candy cane.  Not to mention they came in lovely pinks and blues and greens with dandy little stripes in rainbow arrays.  I’d just as quickly pick them off the tree or pry them out of the box to get my fix.  Such a good time.

Now that I am adult I don’t flourish under the thralls of sugar like I once did.  I’ve stepped away for the most part to protect my health and nourish my body.  As a result, my palette changed.  I started to consume more vegetables and fruits (which I had always loved) and took more care in what I put inside my body.  In the search for more delicious things to drink than water to cure the persistent dehydration I put myself through, I looked to a forgotten past-time:  tea drinking.

What are your favorite teas?  Do you prefer them hot or cold?  I prefer them hot, hot, hot!  Please leave a comment down below!


P.S.  If you would like to know more about herbal remedies, you can check out the book “Herbal Remedies…” by Anne McIntyre for a beginner’s guide.  Highly recommend!